20 Hurtful Misperceptions About Missionaries

By Chuck Lawless

“Missionaries are godly people who serve faithfully around the world, let’s pray for them and walk beside them.”

On behalf of my missionary brothers and sisters, I plead with you to read today’s and tomorrow’s posts.
In the last two weeks, I’ve posted “Misperceptions Laity Have About Pastors” and “Misperceptions Pastors Have About Laity.” A missionary friend encouraged me to write a post about misperceptions about missionaries, so I did some research among missionaries. Today and tomorrow, I will post their thoughts about the misperceptions others hold about them.
1. “We are saints.” They’re not, they told me. They’re regular people answering God’s call to do work across cultures. They struggle with sin. Their families have arguments. Their kids drive them crazy some days. Missionaries don’t want to be heroes (though they often appreciate the affirmation they get).
2. “We all live in a hut in Africa.” Missionaries live all over the world, many in megacities where millions of people live.
3. “When we come to America, we’re coming home.” Home for missionaries is where they live. The place they reside, and the people they’re seeking to reach, become part of them. Coming to the United States can, in fact, be stressful. I’ll always remember one missionary who called me from Walmart, completely stressed because the vast numbers of cereal options overwhelmed him.
4. “We understand U.S. culture.” This misperception relates to #3 above. Missionaries come back to churches that are often more elaborate, supermarkets that are much more “super” and missionary homes that are much bigger than what they have where they live. Often, they don’t know the newest praise choruses or recognize the latest sermon illustrations. Reverse culture shock is real for them.
5. “Your short-term mission trip is a great blessing to us.” It can be, but not always. If your team doesn’t work with the missionary from the beginning—or if you ignore the missionary on the ground to form your own plans—you can make the missionary’s task much harder. Ask how you can help the missionaries rather than telling them what you plan to do.
6. “Our life is just a longer short-term mission trip.” One missionary put it this way: “On a short-term mission trip, you basically do ministry from sun up to sun down. You don’t negotiate with a landlord, struggle with buying groceries and cooking food, homeschool your kids, or stand in long lines to pay a $2.00 bill. Living overseas requires a lot of effort just to live.”

7. “We’re all natural language learners.” That’s not the case. Language learning is difficult, and even those who know the language well might still struggle. Some long-term missionaries never fully master their language—but they press on because they want to share the gospel with their people group. Language learners need our prayers.
8. “Evangelism is easy for us.” Not only is it hard to move a conversation to the gospel, but missionaries must also do that in a second language. Even those believers who go to the ends of the earth still wrestle with engaging somebody with the gospel.
9. “All of us took a vow of poverty.” Not so. They’re serving God, but we need to treat them as worthy of their hire. In fact, some missionaries live in places where the cost of living is quite high.
10. “We’re all living in a revival.” Many are still waiting for someone among their people group to follow Jesus. Some are themselves struggling to find daily joy. Missionary living is not always on the mountaintop.
Return tomorrow for the next 10 misperceptions about missionaries. In the meantime, pray for missionaries today.
Yesterday, I posted 10 misperceptions about missionaries. If you didn’t read that post, I encourage you to go there now.  Here are 10 more misperceptions:
1. “We’re never afraid.” Missionaries are faithful people, but fear can be a reality. Depending on where they serve, they may face public opposition, violence, threats, natural disasters and strange illnesses. Some live continually ready to flee their area if necessary.
2. “We don’t need support from our home churches.” Many missionaries look forward to encouragement, support, relationships and visits from the churches that sent them. They recognize it when churches seem to have forgotten them.
3. “Saying ‘good-bye’ gets easier over the years.” The good-byes for missionaries are numerous and seemingly continual: to family and friends the first time they leave home, and then each time they return to the field after a furlough; to friends on the field each time they return to the United States; to graduating children who go to college; to colleagues who leave the field; to aging parents, likely for the final time. It never gets easier.
4. “When we come back to the United States, we’re the same people who left.” Returning missionaries may look the same, but they’re different. Their experiences on the field change them. Temporary stuff that used to matter doesn’t matter so much any more. Big church buildings no longer impress them. Church conflicts seem foolish now. People matter.
5. “We stay on the field because we love our people group.” They do love their people group, but that’s not the primary reason they stay. They stay because God loves their people group, and they’re just the vessels through whom God gets His message to them.
6. “We can’t wait to speak energetically to your church when we return to the U.S.”  They really do want to tell you what God is doing through their work, but they’re usually returning after several years of hard work with few breaks. They’re tired. They’re facing their own culture shock. Some are also not naturally gifted to speak to large crowds.
7. “We don’t have time to hear your prayer concerns.” Sure, missionaries want us praying for them … but they equally want to pray for us. Some of my missionary friends are the best intercessors I know.
8. “We trust God, so we’re never lonely.” They’re never alone because the Spirit lives within them, but missionaries can still be lonely. Some serve in isolated places with no other believers within days of them. They long for their families, especially when they miss weddings and funerals; in fact, they’re often as close to their own families as others who’ve said to them, “I could never do what you do because I’m so close to my family.”
9. “We don’t know it if you don’t read our newsletters.” Many missionaries work hard to send well-crafted, concise accounts of God’s workings and their prayer concerns. Because of technological resources available today, they can know how many people actually open their newsletters and read them. Don’t discourage them by ignoring their news.
10. “Our greatest conflicts come with nationals.” Actually, the greatest struggles often come with teammates. Interpersonal conflicts are typically magnified in a cross-cultural setting.
I’m sure I have my own misperceptions about missionaries, but I don’t think I’m wrong about this conclusion: They are godly people who serve faithfully around the world. Let’s learn about them, listen to them, pray for them and walk beside them.
And maybe even become one of them.

Why Pastors Think About Quitting

By Josh Reich

“I heard at a conference recently that two out of three pastors are thinking about quitting.”

I heard at a conference recently that two out of three pastors are thinking about quitting. While many statistics often feel made up, I can say that as a pastor, this stat rings true.

Pastors know this.
Many people in their churches do not.
There are a few reasons why pastors think about quitting:
1. Ministry is hard work. Every job is hard. Whether you are a pastor or an electrician or an engineer or a barista. Life and work are hard. Ministry is no different. You can’t be naive about this. Too many pastors have rose colored glasses about putting out a church sign and just expecting people to show up and the people who show up will be bought in, not messy and without difficulty. Yet, the leader and the people who walk through the door are sinners.

Handling your energy is a stewardship issue.

2. They aren’t sleeping or eating well. There is a direct connection between how eat, how you sleep and the level of energy you have. Handling your energy is a stewardship issue. Leaders have a lot of meetings over meals, drink a lot of coffee or energy drinks. They stay up too late watching TV, surfing social media, instead of sleeping, taking a sabbath or doing something that is recharging and refreshing.

There is a direct connection between how eat, how you sleep & your energy level.

3. They don’t have an outlet. Whenever I find myself getting tired, it is often because I am not taking my retreat day, hanging out with friends or doing things that are fun. Leaders and pastors are notorious for being bad friends, not having hobbies and doing things that are fun. You will start to think about quitting, not being thankful, begrudgingly going to meetings or counseling people. Get outside, take a break, slow down.
4. Misplaced idols. If pastors are honest, they struggle with an idol of ministry. In our hearts, many pastors struggle because they want to have a larger church, a larger platform, they want to be known, they want people to be changed by their sermons. Not all of these are wrong, but the motives often are. You will run out of steam if you have an idol. Be honest with someone, have someone ask you hard questions and hold you accountable.

You will run out of steam as a pastor if you have an idol.

5. Not leading from a place of burden. Leaders are idea machines. We read books, go to conferences, listen to podcasts, look for the latest trend, but those are ideas, not a vision. It is easy to confuse the two. A vision, what drives you, comes from a burden. Any leader, if you want to know their vision, ask about their burden. You must keep that in the forefront. I wake up and want to lead and build a church that helps to reach 20- to 40-year-olds. This burden is ingrained in experiences growing up and watching churches fail to reach not only this demographic, but men in particular.

Vision is not an idea, it is a burden.

6. Not dealing with emotions. One thing I was unprepared for was how emotionally tiring ministry and leadership can be. It can be hard to walk with people who get a divorce, get fired, wreck their lives, funerals, miscarriages. This can wreck your heart. You must learn to deal with the emotional ride that pastoring is. If you don’t, you will become a statistic.

How to Implement a Discipleship Process for a Healthy Church

By Brandon Cox

“There are five questions that must be answered by every church’s leadership about their discipleship strategy.”

We are sent, on mission, to make disciples. It is for making more and stronger disciples that the church exists. So … what’s your process for making them?
There are two significant weaknesses common to struggling churches.

• They’ve never discovered or clarified the biblical purposes for which they were founded.
• They’ve never clarified or pursued a basic strategy for making disciples.

Healthy, purpose driven churches have made these two issues very core to their existence. They understand that they exist for the five purposes of worship, evangelism, discipleship, ministry and fellowship. And they understand that discipleship happens best through an intentional process.
Particularly, there are five questions that must be answered by every church’s leadership about their discipleship strategy.
1. How do we help the community around us become part of our crowd? This is the evangelistic mission of the church.
2. How do we help the crowd that gathers on Sunday become a congregation? This is a matter of helping people discover membership in the body.
3. How do we help the congregation remain committed to growing spiritually? This is discipleship—helping people grow in spiritual maturity to be more like Christ.
4. How do we move committed members into the core to serve others? This is how we expand the ministry and help believers to invest their time, talent and treasure.
5. How do we help people glorify God in every aspect of their lives? This is the all-encompassing goal—the worship and magnification of God so that he is glorified in, around and through us.

How would you answer those questions? We pastors tend to love preparing sermons and spending time with our people, but thinking about how our church will actually help people to experience transformation is often something we feel ill-prepared for.
This may be something you’ve wanted to tackle, but haven’t felt you’ve had the time or the know-how, so here are some ideas to jumpstart your creativity.

Get a picture of the goal.

What does a disciple look like? Even when you are one, it’s sometimes hard to put it into words. Hillvue Heights Church, in Bowling Green, Kentucky, believes every disciple should experience conversion, healing and development. Willow Creek wants to help everyone become fully devoted followers of Christ.
So, what’s your end game? What kind of believers do you hope to produce? What knowledge, perspective and skills do you want them to have after being a part of your church family for a few years?

Clarify the next steps.

Once you know what a mature disciple looks like, review your current ministry approach and list out the next steps you have made clearly available to people. The important thing is that people with no previous background in church can know which next step to take and how to take it. Remove as many barriers as possible, especially the barrier of poor communication.

Outline your current process.

Sunday School isn’t a process, it’s a program. It might be a good program that fits into a process, but someone can attend Sunday School for decades and not actually be more spiritually mature. The same can be said of small groups and any number of other ministries. These are great for long-term growth, but how do you know long term growth is actually happening? You need a process for measuring it.
Saddleback Church has done a great job of creating, implementing and offering to the world their CLASS process, which offers a one-time class for each of the major movements. You can discover church membership, spiritual maturity, your shape for ministry, your mission in the world and how to live a life fully devoted to worship. At the end of each class is a covenant and a certificate. This helps Saddleback be able to quantify and measure growth and maturity long term.

Eliminate clutter.

I’ve written previously about my philosophy concerning simplicity in our church structures. Just as a pathway through the woods grows over quickly with weeds and becomes obscured, our process for spiritual growth can easily get crowded out in the busyness of trying to do all things “church.”
Staying simple and lean will require you to fight against the natural tendency to do more. But more isn’t necessarily better. Starting more programs rarely produces more disciples. You may be thinking right now of something that needs to be eliminated from consuming energy in your church that would be better devoted to disciple-making.

Implement tools and resources.

In the west—particularly America—we are extremely well resourced. What this can lead to is a mentality in which we start with the resource instead of our end goal for disciples. Only after you’re confident about the purposes of your church and the process that needs to be implemented do you seek out the resources necessary to get the process going.
At Grace Hills, we are in the process of turning Saddleback’s CLASS material into six-week long small group studies so that, rather than attending a three- or four-hour seminar, people can grow in the context of community together.
What’s your next step? Maybe it’s time to brainstorm a little. Remember that our big mission is to glorify God in all the earth, which starts with making one more disciple by introducing someone to Jesus, connecting them to his family, helping them grow in grace and knowledge, and enabling them to embrace their ministry to others and mission in the world. 

What Church Leaders are Saying about V3 Cohorts

Obviously, here at the V3 Movement we love to work with missionally minded planters and church leaders. One of our greatest joys as a missional church organization is seeing how God allows our ministry to bless those who allow us to partner with them. For us, talking about church planting happens naturally (hence the blog), but we also love to talk about church planters, without whom church planting wouldn’t even be a thing.
So we’ve asked a few V3 Cohort members to share a little about their experiences being in these intimate leadership communities. Shaun and Amanda Wissmann, Josh Oxendine, and Josh Cogan have kindly allowed us to share with you some of their responses. As we prepare to launch the next round of V3 Learning Cohorts, we thought it would be a good idea to let church leaders and planters know a little about what they can expect as told by some veteran cohort members.
By way of brief introduction, Shaun and Amanda recently responded to God’s call and moved to San Bernardino, California, to live missionally among the community there; Josh Oxendine and his wife Brooke are planting/pastoring The Grove Church in Fayetteville, North Carolina; and Josh and Gina Cogan belong to The Awakening Church in Dallas, Texas, a plant where Josh is a pastor and leader.
Not only are these leaders’ V3 Learning Cohorts informing their leadership and missiology within the context of a loving, leadership community, but the Wissmanns, Oxendines, and Cogans are also contributing to the church planting experience of others throughout our organization by sharing their experiences as they live them out in authentic community. This mutualism makes the planting experience richer for everyone involved and is an important factor that shapes and informs V3 as a broad, culturally adept missional organization. So on behalf of the V3 Movement we thank our participants!

Why did you choose to participate in a V3 Cohort?

Shaun and Amanda: We looked at several different organizations before finally landing with V3. In the end, we ultimately chose a V3 Cohort because it felt like God chose it for us. Knowing that we would be planting in a nontraditional way, we needed experienced practitioners to walk alongside of us as we took this journey. We needed people who are movement minded but focused on their immediate neighborhoods. We found that in V3 and knew that there wasn’t a better place for us to be and for us to learn.
Josh Oxendine: I originally found the V3 movement while searching for funding for church planting. After much research I realized that the V3 Movement had much more to give than funding. I also realized that much of my “DNA” was similar to V3’s.

In what way has your cohort affected your ministry?

Josh Cogan: The cohort has given me a deeper understanding of what true discipleship and true incarnational living look like. In a lot of ways V3 has completely taken my “church box” and lit it on fire in an amazing way that has forced me to focus more on Jesus and the leadership of the Holy Spirit rather than my own preconceived notions on what church planting should look like in my context.

The V3 Learning Cohort has given me a deeper understanding of true incarnational living. ~Josh Cogan

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Shaun and Amanda: The most profound way my ministry has been impacted is through peace—peace that this is God’s work and that we can join in it; peace in fruitfulness or in pruning; peace in understanding or in mystery; peace in slow growth or rapid development. Peace, peace, peace. Every week at the end of our cohort calls I have an abounding sense of being exactly where we need to be but looking forward to the places He is taking us.

In what way has your cohort experience affected you as a spouse, friend, parent or neighbor?

Josh Oxendine: It has affected my spouse and I the most. We initially started the group together. This seemed to get slightly chaotic because nobody was around to watch the kids for our weekly call. Nonetheless, we both grew together as a couple, but more so as leaders in our church. Brooke was also able to learn and grow in her missional theology.
Josh Cogan: I feel as if it has challenged me to listen better. This is a great tool to work on no matter the relationship, be it with a spouse, a friend, a neighbor, pastor, etc.
Shaun and Amanda: As a bi-vocational planter, I have seen the cohort affect my job. It has given me a boldness to share my life, as is, in all its messiness. It has also reminded me to be present with the people God has placed around me, because they have messy lives too. This willingness to be myself and to be available has created direct discipleship relationships. It has also challenged our leadership team to be intentional in all the spaces God has placed us in.

What is one essential lesson you’ve learned from this opportunity? 

Josh Oxendine: That God hasn’t called me to build a church; God has called me to make disciples. If I concentrate on making disciples, He will build the church. So, the biggest lesson was refocusing on disciple-making.

God hasn’t called me to build a church; God has called me to make disciples ~Josh Oxendine

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Josh Cogan: Incarnational living means joining in the organic rhythms of the neighborhood, not doing something just because you and/or your team think it’s “cool.”

Given that we’re about to launch the next iteration of V3 cohorts, what would you say to someone who is considering joining?

Shaun and Amanda Wissmann: V3 is pioneering church planting in a way few have attempted before. So, pray about it. Then do it!
Josh Oxendine: Growing leaders grow leaders. The V3 cohort is a great way to do just that. The cohort becomes a family of Jesus lovers who grow together by learning from each other. I don’t know anybody who wouldn’t want that.
Josh Cogan: It will rock your world in the best possible ways. V3 has been an appropriate challenge for me both in my personal faith and as a leader. V3 has also provided a network of brothers and sisters who are in the same “trenches” as me, reminding me that we are not alone in this journey.

Church Planting: “We are not alone in this journey” ~Josh Cogan

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We again want to thank these awesome church planters and missional leaders. Please pray for them and support their ministries!
“I want to be a part of the next V3 Learning Cohort!”

Church Planters and the Cost of Starting a Church

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Research Releases in Leaders & Pastors • April 26, 2016

The last two decades have seen an explosion of church planting and multiplication ministries and networks. Most church startups are planted by leaders in urban core or inner suburban neighborhoods—and this trend, among others, has financial implications for church planters and their families. But what other factors shape their financial reality?
In a study of 769 planters from across the nation, Barna assessed the general financial condition of church startups and their leaders; how different funding models hamper or facilitate various facets of ministry and family life; and what resources leaders need to effectively manage their personal and church finances. The findings from the full study release today in a new Barna report produced in partnership with Thrivent Financial, Church Startups and Money: The Myths and Realities of Church Planters and Finances.
Here are a few of the standout findings.
Church Planters Feel Financially Insecure
As part of the survey, Barna asked what Thrivent calls the “5S question,” which has been asked by more than 85,000 people over the past four years. It is a reliable indicator of a person’s perception of their financial situation—their emotions surrounding money, regardless of their actual financial situation. The question is a self-assessment: “Which of the following best describes your current financial situation?”

1. Surviving: I require financial assistance to get by.
2. Struggling: I am struggling to keep up with day-to-day expenses.
3. Stable: I am fairly stable, but just making ends meet.
4. Secure: I am fairly secure, able to make ends meet and have some left over.
5. Surplus: I have more than I need for myself and my family.

As the graphic shows, church planters’ assessment of their personal financial situation is less stable overall than the general U.S. population. About one-third say they are struggling or surviving (32%), compared to only one in five among all U.S. adults (20%). And they are much less likely to think of their situation as secure (23% vs. 41% of all adults) or in surplus (4% vs. 12%).

The Impact of Strained Finances
Church planters don’t just feel insecure—many are financially insecure. For the most part, planters’ assessments line up with their strained financial reality. If anything, startup leaders’ perceptions are more positive than one might expect, given that three out of five live on a household income lower than the national average. Thirty-nine percent bring in between $35,000 and $50,000 per year, while one in five reports an annual household income of less than $35,000 (21%). In most states, an income of $31,525 or less qualifies a family for food stamps.
Yet resource constraints take a toll on church planters beyond just financial burdens. One-third of startup leaders admit they have considered quitting ministry because of because of financial strain (33%). This admission, perhaps not surprisingly, is most common among pastors in the lower income bracket (47%). Further, and more worrisome, is the fact that similar proportions of leaders report strains on their marriage as a result of the financial stresses associated with church planting (35%). Again, those in the lower income bracket—and those who assess their personal financial situation as surviving or struggling on the 5S question—are most at risk.

Location Impacts Planters’ Finances
Barna identified several factors that shape the financial reality of today’s church planters, which are explored at length in the new report published today. For instance, church location makes a major impact on startup leaders’ finances. There currently seems to be a concentration of startup efforts in large (16%) and medium (26%) cities and in inner suburbs (28%) that ring major metropolitan areas. Seven out of 10 new churches are in cities or dense inner suburbs.

Ministering in cities presents unique financial challenges for many reasons. Urban centers and their surrounding communities are often diverse, but may be segregated by race, education level, economics, age and cultural differences. Thus, urban planters are more likely to have diverse congregations with varying levels of income and needs, as well as higher operational and facility expenses, than their suburban or rural counterparts. Plus, residents of urban centers, no matter their level of income, live in environments with a higher cost of living. This puts extra strain on a church planter’s personal finances.
This is reflected in planters’ 5S assessments. Church planters in cities and inner suburbs feel the most financial strain, likely due at least in part to income that insufficiently covers the cost of living in those areas. Also note than planters in outer suburbs, small towns and rural areas more often consider their financial situation above stable.

What the Research Means
“Barna and Thrivent undertook this research to promote healthy conversations about money and ministry,” says Brooke Hempell, vice president of research at Barna Group and director of the study. “We wanted to uncover insights that would be genuinely useful to both church planters and those who support them, reliable data about planters’ financial burdens and the impact of operating with limited resources. In releasing these findings, our hope is to liberate planters to have open and honest conversations about their financial reality—and that those conversations will lead to innovative ideas that advance the church planting movement into a season of unparalleled health and growth.
“Most church planters are entrepreneurial problem solvers,” Hempell continues, “but these findings add up to a daunting reality for even the most resourceful of ministry leaders. The emotional implications are most concerning. Half of church planters with debt say their burden is a significant or even a ‘huge’ problem. One-third have considered quitting ministry because of finances, and 35 percent say financial problems cause friction in their marriage. The latter should be reason for serious reflection. Ministry and marriage are hard enough without the added stress of insufficient support from the Church.
“We see in this data a call to action to denominations and planting networks to provide greater financial support to startup leaders—especially those in urban neighborhoods. If we want planters to engage a community with the gospel, we should free them up financially and administratively to do so. It is not sustainable for the spiritual leaders of new faith communities to live at or below the poverty line or to take on personal debt to cover everyday living expenses. If we believe in the work they are doing, we must commit more financial resources to their success.”

Our Need Points Us to God

Our Need Points Us to God

Over Spring Break, my husband and I took our three boys to the zoo, where we happily chased peacocks around and marveled at the length of the giraffes’ tongues as we fed them from paper cups.

We also happened by the otters’ cage just as a zookeeper was preparing to feed them. Holding a bucket of fish just out of reach of the otters, she removed one to a side room, began feeding the three left, and explained, “These are three male otters. They beg and eat as if they are starving, but they aren’t. Notice that as soon as they get their fish, they retreat to a private area to protect their food from getting snatched by their brothers.”

Sure enough, as they were each given a fish, they ran to separate corners and promptly masticated their food, smacking loudly, pieces of fish flying, eyes darting around. The zookeeper continued, “We have to remove the mom otter for a private feeding, otherwise her sons would take all the food.” And I’m sure, I thought to myself, all her sanity as well.

Somehow this all seemed vaguely familiar. With three growing boys, I have an ever-increasing grocery bill, and my name to them is not “Mom,” but rather, “Mom, can I have something to eat?” After dinner, there is typically a requested second round of dinner followed by a denied request for a third round of dinner and subsequent claims of starvation. Rather than a zookeeper doling out fish, I’m more like a lion-tamer in the ring, constantly fending off hungry tummies.

At the zoo that day, I was a bit jealous of the mom otter, removed from fish-smackers for a peaceful meal.

It’s difficult sometimes for me to understand my boys’ level of need for food. When the kitchen’s cleaned and closed for the evening, their constant demands can be frustrating. But in the end, I am their mother, and although I don’t fully understand their needs, I want to meet them, because I love my sons.

The fact of the matter is that I am no different from my sons. My needs are just as compulsive — for acceptance, for love, for purpose, for rest, for help — but I have lost the childlike instinct to simply ask my Father for my needs to be met by him. When my sons have a need, they immediately come to me. When I have a need, I veer toward shame, frustration, and guilt.

My boys aren’t above otter-like begging, but I have somehow grown accustomed to muting my needs through attempted self-sufficiency, or berating myself over having needs at all. I am easily frustrated by my own frailty and weakness, believing I suppose that neediness is akin to sinfulness. In fact, neediness is the necessary first step toward relating with and enjoying God, because neediness leads to dependence.

If we let them, our needs point us to God and usher us to his side, seeking an outlet, an answer, a fulfillment in him. In fact, the names he has chosen to call himself in Scripture speak these very things:

• We all have a need for acceptance and belonging. God is called Father of the family we’ve been adopted into, with Christ as our brother. (Galatians 4:4–6; Romans 8:17)

• We are satisfaction-seekers. Jesus is called the Bread of Life and Living Water, of whom we can daily partake. (John 6:35; John 4:13–14)

• We all need outside help for spiritual vitality and growth. The Holy Spirit is called Helper, Counselor, and Convictor, because he enables and empowers us. (John 14:16–17, 26; 16:7–11) 

• We all need deliverance from the power and weight of sin, along with the shame and guilt it births. Jesus is called Savior and Deliverer and Justifier, removing the curse of sin and making us right before God. (Galatians 3:13–14; Colossians 1:13, 19–22; 2:13–15)

• We all need rest and refreshment, which we find as we brush up against our physical limits. God is Lord of the Sabbath, giving rest to his saints. (Matthew 12:8; Psalm 127:2; 29:11; 4:8; Hebrews 4:9–11)

God’s names, in turn, give us new names. He changes who we are. We are no longer orphans seeking our belonging; we are the Adopted. We are no longer thirsty; we are the Forever-Satisfied. We are no longer condemned; we are the Approved. We are no longer helpless and hopeless; we are the Helped.

The best part about the nature of our God is that he doesn’t begrudge our need. As a mother who loves her children imperfectly, I long to give my children everything I can possibly give them. As a Father who loves perfectly, he gives us exactly what we need in exactly the right way. Better yet, he understands our need, having walked in our human shoes of physical limits and emotional and relational pain.

In the face of our great need, the only option for us is to become like a hungry growing boy — or perhaps an otter begging for its fish. Rather than focus on the needs or think ourselves silly for having them, we must let our hunger pains point to the Need Meeter.

When we approach him, our Christ is no lion-tamer, pushing us away in our weariness and hunger and thirst. He instead says, “Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest” (Matthew 11:28). He says, “Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be satisfied” (Matthew 5:6).

He receives us with gladness, because he is the very one we need.

10 Disciplines of a Godly Man

By Jarrid Wilson

Real men will make sure they are growing in these 10 characteristics.

Matt Chandler once said, “We’ve got a lot of boys with beards these days,” and I believe these words speak powerful truth.
Our world is constantly throwing out ideas of what it means to really be a man. The reality is that everyone has their own opinion, but as a Christian the only blueprint men should mimic their life after is that of the Bible. To know what a true man is, we need look no further than the life of Jesus Christ himself. Makes sense doesn’t it? As the Son of God, Jesus is the epitome of manhood, manliness and what we should strive for in our attempt at being a reflection of true maturity in Christ.
Jesus was completely full of the Holy Spirit, not to mention he lived in complete dependence and obedience to the will of God. It’s a beautiful testimony. Easier said than done, but the strive for this lifestyle is one that will set apart men from the boys. Christ fully displayed the fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22-23), and he did it with a righteous swagger. A true man of God will show evidence of these works.

Here are 10 other disciplines of a godly man.

1. Humility

“Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves. Don’t look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others, too. You must have the same attitude that Christ Jesus had.” (Philippians 2:3-5) 

2. Purity

“We prove ourselves by our purity, our understanding, our patience, our kindness, by the Holy Spirit within us, and by our sincere love.” (2 Corinthians 6:6)

3. Kindness

“Never let loyalty and kindness leave you! Tie them around your neck as a reminder. Write them deep within your heart.” (Proverbs 3:3)

4. Patience

“But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness.” (Galatians 5:22)

5. Forgiveness

“Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.” (Colossians 3:13)

6. Understanding

“Tune your ears to wisdom, and concentrate on understanding.” (Proverbs 2:2)

7. Integrity

“People with integrity walk safely, but those who follow crooked paths will be exposed.” (Proverbs 10:9)

8. Faithfulness

“By faith we understand that the universe was created by the word of God, so that what is seen was not made out of things that are visible.” (Hebrews 11:2)

9. Sacrifice

“Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.” (John 15:13)

10. Love

“So we have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us. God is love, and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him.” (1 John 14:16)
A true man, like Jesus, is obedient to the Father’s will and is about His Father’s business (Hebrews 10:9). This is such a powerful truth, and it’s one that Christian men cannot look past. 

3 Mistakes Every Worship Leader Should Avoid

By Todd Fields

Being aware of these moments gives people an opportunity to see who God is even more.

Do people connect to God through your service, or are they simply clapping along?

It’s good to reflect on this type of question when evaluating your church’s worship service. Why? Because whether you have a well seasoned team for worship or a crowd of fresh faces, analyzing your worship service allows you to see blind spots you might otherwise miss. Believe it or not, many worship leaders can actually hinder their services by committing a few easy-to-fix mistakes.

These mistakes may not be obvious blunders, in fact, they often occur slowly over time. But, if given enough time, they’ll stunt your church’s growth and make it more difficult for your congregation to engage in the service.

Here are three of the most common mistakes. You can learn to overcome these and improve your worship service by clicking here to download the free ebook 6 Simple Tips to Improve Your Worship Service. 

Mistake 1: You don’t align with your pastor:
You handle the music and he/she handles the preaching, right?
Not necessarily.
Connecting with your pastor is crucial as it helps tear down silos and move as a cohesive unit toward a God-sized vision for your church.
Mistake 2: You never interact with the congregation OFF stage.
This doesn’t mean you have to be best friends with everyone in your church.
But, as worship leaders, the more we know about the people in our worship services and are able to empathize with their struggles, the better we’re able to lead them during the worship time.
Mistake 3: You don’t move to moments.
Here’s what we mean by that.
Sometimes it’s easy to simply stand up and go from one song to the next. But, as you and your team prepare, try to identify the spot in the set or song that would be a powerful moment for people if a verse was read, or a chorus was repeated.
Being aware of these moments gives people an opportunity to see who God is even more.
Because your worship service is so important, taking every opportunity to learn is paramount. Click Here to download the FREE eBook 6 Simple Tips to Improve Your Worship Service and help people connect to God through your worship!

5 Things First-Time Guests HATE Doing at Church

By Dale Hudson

If you are asking your first-time guests to do any of these things, you may be unknowingly pushing them away and causing them to not return.

If you are asking your first-time guests to do any of these things, you may be unknowingly pushing them away and causing them to not return.

1. People hate waiting in line.

Are you asking first-time guests to wait in line? How long are they having to wait in line to register? How long are they having to wait to drop off their kids at the classroom? How long are they having to wait to pick up their kids?
Solution

• Have a separate check-in area for first-time guests.
• Monitor your drop-off and pick-up lines. If the line starts backing up, be prepared to open another line.

 2. People hate not knowing where to go.

You know what it’s like. You’re in a big store … looking for an item … no help in sight … without a clue about where to find it. It’s very frustrating. Asking people to navigate your church without any signage or personal help has the same affect on people.
Solution

• Have clear signage.
• Always walk people to their class, room, etc. instead of telling them where to go.

3. People hate to be ignored.

Ever been alone at a party or event and you didn’t know anyone? Everyone is engaged in conversation. It becomes very awkward as you struggle to connect with someone. People feel that same awkwardness when they walk into church and are not greeted or acknowledged.
Solution

• Have greeters at every door. Pick the right people for this role. They should be friendly and have the ability to make people feel welcome and comfortable.
• Don’t just greet people at the door. Have hosts that will engage guests in conversation beyond the door and get them connected to other people who will make them feel at home.

4. People hate being singled out.

People want to be welcomed, but not embarrassed. I’ve seen churches have guests remain standing after a song is over, or worse yet, have them stand up and introduce themselves. Unless they are a politician running for office, they hate this.
Solution

• Make guests feel welcome privately, but don’t single them out or recognize them publicly.
• Be friendly, but don’t be so friendly they feel like they are being asked to buy a car by a used car salesman.

5. People hate not being able to find a good parking spot or having to settle for a crummy one.

We all get frustrated driving around a parking lot trying to find a spot. The opposite is true when we find a great parking spot. We experience a rush of relief and happiness. The same is true for people who pull into your church parking lot.
Solution

• Ask staff and key volunteers to take the worst parking spots and save the best parking spots for first-time guests.
• Have reserved parking for first-time guests.

Darrin Patrick Fired Over ‘Historical Pattern of Sin’

Megan Briggs

The leaders of The Journey Church in St. Louis have announced they are removing Pastor Darrin Patrick from office at The Journey and “requir[ing] him to step down from all internal and external leadership positions.”
In addition to being the pastor of The Journey, Darrin Patrick has filled numerous other roles over the years, including vice president of Acts 29 Network and a council member of The Gospel Coalition. More recently, he was supposed to speak at the Council on Biblical Manhood and Womanhood Conference, which was held April 11-12.
In a letter explaining the situation to their members, The Journey wrote Patrick was asked to step down, not because of adultery, but because he “did violate the high standard for elders in marriage through inappropriate meetings, conversations and phone calls with two women (I Tim. 3.2).” More succinctly, they cited “historical patterns of sin” and “other deep sin patterns in Darrin that do not reflect the biblical qualifications for an elder.”
The end of the letter includes a statement from Patrick, who takes a remorseful tone and offers an apology for “the pain that my sin is causing you, as well as the broken trust that my sin has clearly produced.” He goes on to say, “I am a completely devastated man, utterly broken by my sin and in need of deep healing.”
Even in the closing of the letter, Patrick points people to the hope and redemption found in Christ, reminding the congregation that God “loves us completely in spite of our sin, delights in us when we are at our weakest, and that He is, indeed, the restorer and healer of all brokenness.”
Many will find the news shocking considering Patrick’s prominent role, not only at The Journey but also among broader evangelicalism. His removal from leadership evokes memories of others, like Mark Driscoll (the founder of Acts 29 and Mars Hill Church), who also resigned after being confronted by leadership at his church.
Please join us in praying for Darrin Patrick, his family and all those impacted by this change.

Megan Briggs

Megan Briggs is a content editor and passionate follower of Christ. Two things – she believes – that should be linked together more often. Her experience in ministry to youth and parents as well as the extensive amount of time she’s spent in ministry overseas gives her a unique perspective on the global church. Megan is passionate about spreading the gospel and equipping the church for holiness. When she’s not writing or proofreading, Megan likes to run.

How to Help Your Kids Fall Deeper in Love With God

By Erin Woodfin

“I believe that there are three things that can bring discipleship back into the home and make it a reality once again.”

Discipleship is a word that is thrown around in ministry a lot these days. Church staff members in many of our churches are constantly searching for the next big idea on how to lead people to become more devoted followers of Christ. This is a question that keeps many ministers up at night. This is a question that I have asked myself numerous times. How do I get kids to fall deeper in love with the God who created them? How do I get them to own their faith and eventually share it with others? How do we get kids to understand that salvation is so much more than being able to spend forever in heaven with God? The answer that I keep coming back to is the fact that this can only happen through the family. Psalm 78 has played over and over in my head,

“We will not hide them from their children, but tell to the coming generation the glorious deeds of the Lord, and his might, and the wonders that he has done. He established a testimony in Jacob and appointed a law in Israel, which he commanded our fathers to teach to their children, that the next generation might know them, the children yet unborn, and arise and tell them to their children, so that they should set their hope in God and not forget the works of God, but keep his commandments; and that they should not be like their fathers, a stubborn and rebellious generation, a generation whose heart was not steadfast, whose spirit was not faithful to God.”

And this is just four verses! There is so much within this text that we often miss. It does not say that the church is supposed to tell the coming generations of the deeds of the Lord, but the family. Discipleship is both initiated and cultivated in the home. Parents have more influence than they can ever imagine when it comes to the spiritual development of their children. When children see faith displayed in the lives of their parents, they naturally will want to display those same qualities. Yet, the question that is asked by so many parents is, “Where do we begin with this seemingly daunting task?” I believe that there are three things that can bring discipleship back into the home and make it a reality once again.

1. Parents must tell their children how they came to faith in Christ.

I can think of many children that have no idea how their parents came to know Christ. The children know that their parents believe, however they are not sure what drew them into a relationship with Jesus. Your story of salvation is also a part of your child’s story of salvation. Therefore, telling them how you met Jesus makes salvation a real thing to them. The more they hear your story about salvation, the more they are likely to experience their own story of salvation. It is one thing for a pastor to stand in the pulpit on Sunday mornings and talk about coming to faith in Christ. When children hear the story of how you came to faith in Christ, it becomes more meaningful to them. This allows the children to grasp what life is like without Christ, to realize their own lostness. But more importantly, they get to hear how Christ changed you and how you are now a new person. All of a sudden salvation becomes more real to them. This can be the beginning of a continual spiritual conversation in the household.

2. Parents must take every opportunity to point to Christ.

We look for teaching moments in a child’s life every day. However, these usually pertain to their behavior rather than their Spiritual development. God blesses many of us with 6,408 days (from brith to 18 years) to continuously point our children to Himself. If parents are the primary disciplers of their children, then every moment can either point them to God or to the world. We will do whatever it takes to make sure we have “good” kids that have “good” behavior. However, our behavior is what flows out of our heart. Therefore, issues of behavior are truly a matter of the heart. Matthew 15:19 says, “But what comes out of the mouth proceeds from the heart, and this defiles a person.” Luke 6:45 says, “The good person out of the good treasure of his heart produces good, and the evil person out of his evil treasure produces evil, for out of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaks.” Jesus was telling his listeners that who we truly are comes from the heart. Moments of discipline are teaching moments pointing back to our belief in God. Therefore, we must understand that there is so much going on beneath what we see on the surface. As parents, God has equipped us to speak directly into their heart by pointing them to the Savior Jesus Christ.

3. Parents must show their children Jesus by the way they live.

This is the scary part, because if anyone knows that parents mess up it is their children. They see the good, the bad and the ugly. However, parents can live a life that is pleasing to the Lord, and their children will follow suit. I remember growing up and watching my parents love others in a way that had a huge impact on how I now treat others. I also remember seeing my parents being confronted with a people who were upset or agitated, and how they handled that person with so much grace and mercy. I am not at all saying that they were perfect; they did however model for me the fruits of the Spirit. They showed me that if Jesus truly lived in my life, then others will notice by the way I talk and by how I love others. Sometimes living out your spiritual life in front of your kids means admitting that you are a sinner too. This is scary, but whether you like it or not, your children know that you are not perfect. So it is time to take down the mask and admit that you struggle with certain things. Just think about the impact it would make to a child who struggles with anger to sit down with their parent, and the parent explains how they handle life when they are angry. This would change the way kids understood their parents.

Psalms 127:3-5 says, “Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one’s youth. Blessed is the man who fills his quiver with them! He shall not be put to shame when he speaks with his enemies in the gate.” Children are a blessed gift from the Lord. Therefore, their spiritual development is of upmost importance to the family and to the church. God has called parents to be the primary disciplers of their children and not the church. The church is called to journey alongside parents.

We are in this together. Parents the church is for you, we are ready to fight for your children with you. 

5 Habits of Healthy Church Growth

By Staff Writer

“You can frame it as church growth if you want, but church growth is directly related to the effectiveness and the health of the church mission”

God is inviting us to participate in the expansion of His kingdom. And, He’s given us the responsibility to evangelize and steward the people He brings to us. This is the heart of church growth.

[UPDATE]: NEW VERSION – 11 FULL HABITS IN EBOOK
This resource is a tool featuring content from some of the best ChurchLeaders articles on church growth, evangelism, and discipleship, all rolled into one article. We compiled it to make you aware of the barriers that might be hindering your church’s growth, and we provide action items and solutions to break through those barriers. However, you have to apply these principles in your church and in your local ministry context.
Habit 1: Growing Churches Replicate Leadership

You know…the one where Jethro counseled Moses about burning out? Here’s a quick refresher: 
13 The next day Moses sat to judge the people, and the people stood around Moses from morning till evening. 14 When Moses’ father-in-law saw all that he was doing for the people, he said, “What is this that you are doing for the people? Why do you sit alone, and all the people stand around you from morning till evening?” 15 And Moses said to his father-in-law, “Because the people come to me to inquire of God; 16 when they have a dispute, they come to me and I decide between one person and another, and I make them know the statutes of God and his laws.” 17 Moses’ father-in-law said to him, “What you are doing is not good. 18 You and the people with you will certainly wear yourselves out, for the thing is too heavy for you. You are not able to do it alone. 19 Now obey my voice; I will give you advice, and God be with you! You shall represent the people before God and bring their cases to God, 20 and you shall warn them about the statutes and the laws, and make them know the way in which they must walk and what they must do. 21 Moreover, look for able men from all the people, men who fear God, who are trustworthy and hate a bribe, and place such men over the people as chiefs of thousands, of hundreds, of fifties, and of tens. (Exodus 18:13-21, ESV)
It wasn’t feasible for Moses to continue being the sole decision maker among all the people. This isn’t an easy task. It will require you to trust other people and to relinquish control of certain tasks. You may not be able to make every hospital visit, or lead another discipleship group, or conduct a wedding. You may have to start saying no to things. And you have to be okay with disappointing some people.
Habit 2: Growing Churches Have Enough Room for People
True or False – If you have empty seats in your meeting space, you have enough room?
False.
You may think that because there are empty seats in your service, you have enough room. But, when a room reaches 70%-80% of its seating capacity, it’s running close to exceeding its comfort capacity. That means if first-time visitors to your church feel cramped, they may not come back. This principle applies not only to your main meeting space, but to every classroom and other meeting room in your church.
CAUTION: The temptation may be to create a second service thinking the congregation will evenly split in half to attend each service. This isn’t usually the case, however. If your church comfortably seats 500 people and you move to a second service, the reality is 400 people will attend one service and 100 may attend the other.
[UPDATE]: NEW VERSION – 11 FULL HABITS IN EBOOK
Habit 3: Growing Churches are Led by Growing Leaders

Leaders are Learners
Nelson Searcy said “growing churches are led by growing leaders.” Being intentional about growing as a leader, growing in your knowledge and understanding of the Word, and growing in your walk with Christ are all essential to growing your church.
Action Items:

• Create a monthly reading plan to read one new book each month. It doesn’t even have to be a Christian living book. But, remember that leaders are readers.
• Find online learning opportunities.
• Find a mentor or coach you consistently meet with to keep you on track with your goals, and to provide outside perspective on your decisions.

Habit 4: Growing Churches are Outwardly Focused

What does it mean to be outwardly focused?

It means you and your team are more concerned with outreach, discipleship, and evangelism than with buildings, resources, and overhead. Get those backwards and the wrong focus will sap your church’s energy and ability for real ministry. In persecuted countries, where physical church buildings don’t exist, there is oftentimes a stronger outward focus on ministry.

This moves outreach and evangelism from being a “spectator sport” that only paid staff participate in, to involving the entire church. How do you know if you’re too inwardly focused? According to Nelson Searcy, you should have a ratio of five first-time guests for every 100 regular attenders.

Habit 5:  Growing Churches Have Leaders that Please the Right People

Shouldn’t pastors please everyone?

The answer to that question is a big, fat NO.

At the end of the day we all want to be liked and respected. But, if we’re going to be effective leaders, we have to accept the fact that we can’t please everyone. It’s impossible to make every person attending your church happy. So, we have to please the Lord first and foremost. Then, we have to please the right people. Who are the right people?

The Right People

• Understand and share the mission and vision of your church
• Are not emotional leeches that suck the life out of other people
• Are wise and emotionally healthy
• Have a track record of moving the mission of the church forward
• Are teachable

[UPDATE]: NEW VERSION – 11 FULL HABITS IN EBOOK